Suicides in the family

14 years ago, today I found my Mom, dead from a gunshot to her head.  While this post may not be about Genealogy - it might be important for future family members to know. 

I don't believe in hiding truths. The truth was my mom, had some mental demons she had most of her life. Maybe because she grew up during a time, when if you didn't have a father, you were called a Bastard child.  She was raised by her Mom and they were very poor. I guess it was my Grandma who made up the story that he died in a plane crash before she was born. Although children were very mean back then, and she was still called a Bastard. It really effected my Mom. 

When I was searching for her so-called father, I came across some startling information. That her supposed father, actually lived till 1958 and he shot himself in the head. Whoa, a suicide. 

8 lines down is when she tells me of his suicide. 

Then as I searched his family, I found that his Father, Michael committed suicide by walking into a gravel pit.  and drowned - another suicide. 

Mind you this is when I thought they were my Mom's real dad and Grandfather. It kind of freaked me out - because I've struggled with depression and there was a time I had suicidal thoughts. I was determined not to be the 4th generation of suicides. 

Fortunately, I have since learned that who I thought was her Bio father, was not. I have found my Mom's real bio dad and family line. 

Terribly sad though - I felt really attached to them, all the time believing they were my Mom's paternal line and I was a part of them. 

Still, an interesting story.